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Kobe Bryant Admits He’s No Michael Jordan

By Bill Matthews Kobe proves once more that he can’t live up to MJ (LOS ANGELES) Kobe Bryant stood before the podium this morning, at a loss for words. It was an uncharacteristic sight—the Laker guard is always good for a quote. But he never regained his composure, and only spoke afterward in an exclusive … Read more

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Christmas Moving To August Next Year

By Xavier Muhammad Jiminy and Merry Christmas at the family gathering in 1932. (HENDERSON, NC) The skittish economy has taken its toll on Christmas. Walter Christmas told The Peoples News that his family’s annual winter barbecue–which became so popular in the 1930s that it lent its name to the celebration of Jesus’ birth–will move to … Read more

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Charlie Murphy To Host The Oscars

By Shawna Collier New host (HOLLYWOOD) One day after Eddie Murphy dropped out of hosting the Oscars, the Academy dropped a bombshell: His brother, Charlie Murphy, will emcee the extravaganza. “Charlie Murphy is an amazing talent, an incredible storyteller, and he scares the hell out of everyone,” new Oscar producer Brian Grazer told The Peoples … Read more

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Michael Jackson’s Final Recording

Michael (front and center, naturally) as I like to remember him. Conrad Murray was the worst kind of doctor. Michael Jackson was the worst kind of patient: A drug addict who needed desperately to sleep. Together, they were a terrible, combustible, ill-fated combination. And now Murray is headed to jail, and Michael is still gone. … Read more

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A Black Guy Could Be President?

By Craig Bates Not presidential? Here’s a graph from the Huffington Post recently: At roughly noon on Tuesday, shortly after Gov. Rick Perry unveiled the tax policy platform for his presidential campaign, President Obama’s reelection team offered a response. The Texas Republican and top challenger to Mitt Romney wanted to “shift a greater share of … Read more

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Black Charlie’s Angel Prepares For Third Banana Role

By Bill Matthews Charlie’s Angels stars Rachael Taylor, Minka Kelly, and the black one. (HOLLYWOOD) She’s got a big smile, long legs, curly hair and a spot on a primetime network show, but unfortunately for the black girl on Charlie’s Angels, she’s paired with two white girls. While Rachael Taylor and Minka Kelly will undoubtedly … Read more

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An Indefensible Position: Jim Brown is Overrated

By Bill Matthews Good, but not that good You know what really grinds my gears? Anything from Cleveland. I’m looking at you, Burgess Meredith, Cleveland Cavaliers, Halle Berry, pollution. All of you! So I’m throwing down the gauntlet, Cleveland. And here it is: Jim Brown is overrated. Yeah, I said it. Oh sure, Jim Brown … Read more

Serena Williams Will Kick Your Ass

By Bill Matthews It’s go time! (MIAMI) Fresh off her out-of-control diatribe at the U.S. Open, Serena Williams announced she is leaving tennis to kick some ass. “Your boyfriend is cheating on you? I’ll kick his ass. Your boss won’t give you that raise? I’ll kick his ass. Your kid is doing bad in school? … Read more

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